You say your child comes first but you’re asking for advice on what to do with the If I’m drunk take me to Jasmine shirt. If I were in your shoes and I was to say my child came first (which he does, all of the time) that dog would be gone. The scenario you described could have been so much worse. Been through this myself with a cocker spaniel that I’d rescued, found a charity that felt specifically with the breed & issues that go to a foster home before a forever home. It’s tough but the dog needs to go. Toddlers face & dogs face height don’t bear thinking about. Sorry, brother.
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Seems pretty obvious to me, you had the dog first If I’m drunk take me to Jasmine shirt, a kid needs to go. Make sure you charge a rehoming fee to ensure she goes to a good family. We have a beagle mix. She showed similar signs of fear/aggression towards our children, but mostly in the evening. She’s a rescue so not sure of her history. But I think their quick movements, loud voices, and overall more erratic gestures and such scared our dog. Our kids are much older then 18mos so we just had them stay away from her when she showed those signs and I had them give her treats and rewards when they were all calm and playful during the day. It’s much better now.